78 Scandinavians

Towards an introduction

Ethnic pride is stupid. Especially for Scandinanvians.

The point was driven home when I encountered a book purporting to rank the 100 most influential Jews in history. The top 5, as I recall (I might be off on the order) were: Moses, Jesus, Einstein, Marx and Freud. A similar book charts the greatest Italians. Not quite as impressive as the Jews. But between the Roman empire and the Renaissance, (and radio) the Italians seem to have produced their disproportionate number of geniuses. (Galileo was the top wop.)

Despite my disdain for ethnic pride, when I saw these books, I thought "Why no such book about my own people? Who are the 100 greatest Scandinavians?"

I looked into it. The depressing answer seems to be that there haven't been that many. "I'll be lucky," I thought, "if I can find 78."

This is a work in progress. It represents my effort so far to list and rank history's 78 most important and influential Scandinavians. I will attempt to write a short biography of each, assess their achievements, good or ill, on the model of the above-mentioned books on history's outstanding Jews and Italians. I hope it will amount to a book itself, but for the moment, this project's home is my blog.

So far what I have is a list. For the moment, they're in roughly chronological order. When I've determined the final 78, I'll rank them in order of their importance, to the best of my ability.

If you can think of a worthy candidate not yet on the list, I will be most grateful if you let me know. A couple of rules, however.

(1) The individual must be historically well attested. It's possible, even probable, that Wotan, Thor, et cetera were kings or heroes of ancient Scandinavia euhemerized into gods--but we don't know, so they don't qualify.

(2) Finns are not Scandinavians.

Here's the list so far.

Towards a ranking of the 78 most important and influential Scandinavians in history

Harald Wartooth (8th-9th centuries) King of Sweden, Denmark, Norway and Wendland

Rurik (c. 830-879) founded ruling dynasty of Russia

Harald Fairhair (850-933) 1st king of Norway

Rollo (c. 870-932) “Robert I” founded Normandy

Skallagrimsson, Egil (c. 910-980) Warrior, skald

Gormsdaughter, Gunnhild (c.910-980) Queen of Norway and Northumbria, "Mother of Kings"

Thorvaldson, Erik (c. 950-1003) also known as Erik the Red, founded Norse colony in Greenland

Ericson, Leif (c. 970-1020) founded Norse colony in Newfoundland

Sigrid the Haughty (10th century)

Olaf Tryggvasson (d. 1000)

Gudrid the Far Traveler (11th c.)

Sweyn Forkbeard (c. 960-1014) king of Denmark, England, Norway

Canute (c. 1150-1196)

Sturluson, Snorri (1179-1241) Icelandic historian, poet, wrote Prose Edda

Magnus III Ladulas of Sweden (d. 1290)

Saint Birgitta (1303-73)

Margaret of Denmark (1353-1412) Queen of Denmark, united Scandinavia under her rule: the Union of Kalmar

Eric “XIII” (1382-1436) (Eric of Pomerania) King of Kalmar union, deposed

Engelbrekt Engelbrektsson (1390s -1436) Swedish rebel, statesman: “awakening of Swedish national consciousness”

Christian II (15th-16th centuries) last king of Denmark, Sweden and Norway, mad man, tyrant

Dacke, Nils (16th century) Swedish revolutionary, lead the “Dacke Revolution”: the greatest popular revolt in Swedish history

Gustav Vasa (1496-1560) Swedish king, broke with Roman Catholicism, founded Vassa dynasty

Tycho Brahe (1546-1601) Swedish astronomer. Last important astronomer to hold to geocentric model. Worked with Kepler; they hated each other. Tycho complied the astrological data on which Kepler’s laws of planetary motion are based. He was ill-tempered, quarreled his king, Christian IV, who had given him an island on which to build an observatory, and whose patronage Tycho abandoned in favor that offered by the eccentric Emperor Rudolf II (who was insane). Tycho fought duels. An opponent’s sword swiped off his nose, and for the rest of his life he wore a silver prosthesis in its place. There’s a crater of the moon or something named for him.
Christian IV of Denmark (1577-1648) Involved Denmark in the Thirty Years War, partially out of religious considerations, partially to further his own territorial ambitions in Germany. Failed spectacularly, then saw mainland Denmark overrun and despoiled by Wallenstein in retaliation. Lost an eye in battle, as a good Scandinavian king should.

Bureus, Johannes (17th century) Swedish Runic scholar, writer, “Rosicrucian”

Gustavus Adolphus (1594-1632) Swedish monarch, military genius. Called the “Lion of the North.” Inaccurately remembered as “the father of modern war.” An accomplished soldier, and a king, while in his teens. Fluent in eight languages. Travelled anonymously in Germany on a long term reconnaissance mission. Trudged, rode, fought, froze and starved alongside his soldiers in wars against Denmark, Russia, and Poland. By the time he finally invaded Germany he carried a bullet lodged in his neck. With reluctant French and Saxon allies, Gustavus turned the tide of the thirty years war before dying a hero’s death at the battle of Lutzen.

Oxenstierna, Axel (1583-1654) Swedish statesman, regent, general. Ruled Sweden during the minority of queen Christiana, negotiated in the peace of Westphalia.
Christina Alexandra (1626-1689) queen of Sweden (abdicated)

Charles XII (1682-1718) Swedish monarch, military genius. Defeated by Peter the Great of Russia. Exile in Turkey, showed up in Sweden long after being presumed dead. Killed in battle against Norwegian rebels. (This I presume was Scandinavia’s last moment of military relevance until the Resistance.)

Swedenborg, Emmanuel (1688-1772) Swedish philosopher, scientist, mystic

Gustavus III (18th c.) Swedish king, assassinated

Holberg, Ludvig (18th century?) Norwegian playwright, historian, satirist, philosopher, the “Scandinavian Voltaire”

Bergman, T.O. (18th c.) Swedish scientist, created affinity tables

Scheele, C.W. (18th century) Swedish scientist, discovered oxygen 1773

Celsius, Anders (1701-1744) Swedish astronomer, Celsius temperature scale

Linnaeus, Carl (1707-1778) Swedish botanist, father of modern taxonomy

Orsted, Hans Christian (1777-1851) Danish physicist & chemist, “clarified the relationship between magnetism and electricity”

Berzelius, J.J. (1779-1848) Swedish chemist, fixed atomic weights, devised modern system of chemical notation.

Bremer, Fredrika (1801-1865) Swedish writer, feminist, activist

Anderson, Hans Christian (1805-1875) Danish author folklorist

Kierkegaard, Soren (1813-1855) Danish philosopher and theologian. “Father of Existentialism.” Wrote over twenty books by his early 40s, then died.

Ibsen, Henrik (1828-1906) Norwegian playwright, founder of modern drama, poet

Bjonson, Bjornstjerne (1832-1910) Norwegian writer, Nobel prize, wrote Norwegian national anthem

Nobel, Alfred (1833-1896) Swedish engineer, invented dynamite, endowed Nobel prize

De Laval, Gustaf (19th century) inventor, agricultural engineer, rivaled Edison in number and variety of patents

Hansen, G. H. Armauer (1841-1912) Norwegian physician, identified the causative agent of leprosy

Grieg, Edvard (1843-1907) Norwegian composer and pianist

Strindberg, August (1849-1912) Swedish playwright

Arrhenius, Svante (1859-1927) Swedish chemist, Nobel prize, first scientist to predict greenhouse effect

Hamson, Knut (1859-1952) Norwegian novelist (Nobel)

Munch, Edvard (1863-1944) Norwegian expressionist painter “The Scream”
Rolvaage, Ole Edvart (1876-1931) Norwegian American novelist: “Giants In the Earth”

Unset, Sigrid (1882-1949) Norwegian novelist (Nobel)

Dinesen, Isak (1885-1962) (Karen Blixen) Danish author: “Out of Africa”

Bohr, Niels (1885-1962) Danish physicist, fundamental contributions to atomic structure, quantum theory, Nobel prize, Manhattan project

Quisling, Vidkun (1887-1945) Norwegian traitor. (‘Quisling’ apparently has come to mean ‘traitor’ in Europe the way ‘Benedict Arnold’ means traitor in the USA.)

Myrdal, Gunnar (1898-1987) Swedish economist, sociologist, politician, writer: “An American Dilemma: The Negro Problem and Modern Democracy”

Hammarskjold, Dag (1905-1961) Swedish diplomat, author, president of U.N., Nobel Peace prize

Garbo, Greta (1905-1990) Swedish actress

Lindgren, Astrid (1907-2002) Swedish children’s author (Pippi Longstocking)

Heyerdahl, Thor (1914-2002) Norwegian scientist, explorer

Bergman, Ingrid (1915-82) Swedish actress “Casablanca”

Sonsteby, Gunnar (b. 1918) Norwegian resistance fighter

Bergman, Ingmar (1918-2007) Swedish film director

Sveinbjorn, Beintensson (1924-1993) Icelandic pagan revivalist

Von Sydow, Max (b. 1926) Swedish actor

Borg, Bjorn (b. 1956) Swedish tennis champion

Kamprad, Ingvar Feodor (b. 1926) founded IKEA, billionaire: 11th wealthiest man in the world

Bjork (b. 1965) Icelandic singer-songwriter, actress, global celebrity

Bostrom, Nick (b. 1973) Swedish philosopher, transhumanist

Torvalds, Linus (b. 1969) Swedish-Finnish software engineer, created the “Linux kernel”

Carlsen, Magnus (b. 1990) Norwegian chess prodigy




towards a bibliography
Churton, Tobias The Invisible History of the Rosicrucians, The World’s Most Secret Society
Dupuy, Trevor Nevitt The Military Life of Gustavus Adolphus: Father of Modern War
Durrenberger, Paul E. The Dynamics of Medieval Iceland: Political Economy & Literature
Derry, T.K. A History of Scandinavia: Norway, Sweden, Denmark & Iceland
Wedgwood, C.V. The Thirty Years War
Weibul, Jorgen Swedish History In Outline
Wilson, David M. The Northern World: The History And Heritage of Northern Europe AD 400-1100

Mother Russia

A Russian friend of mine once summarized for me his impression of Americans. "Americans,” he declared, “are well fed slaves." He was about twenty years old at the time, and already a college graduate. Obviously he was very bright. He had a computer-related job, drove a new car. He could not, as he told me on another occasion, ever return to Russia, because if he did he would be immediately placed under arrest and charged with ducking his compulsory military service. In his homeland, all he had to look forward to was a prison cell.

He once nearly accidentally broke my skull with a cue stick, which he insisted on using to illustrate a point from Miyamoto Musashi. I haven't seen him in over a decade. I sometimes wonder what happened to him.

Video games

I'm terrified of video games. Consider how far CGI have come in the last decade. How long before they're indistinguishable from reality proper? And when that day comes, how many of us will opt to become brains in vats? Judging from the number who, even now, effectively already have, I suspect a great many; maybe most of us, or eventually virtually all. We'll drown in a digital deluge.

no title

Beautiful women rule the world. Always have, always will. You might as well complain about the weather.

New Science

Last month, according to New Scientist, a Dutch research organization "demonstrated a new type of wireless body network" whose system converts "ultra-low-power electrocardiogram sensors into wireless nodes," permitting the transmission of "physiological data to a hub." The article is entitled "Body organs can send status updates on your cell phone."

Soon, our hearts will have their "very own IP addresses."

It may be--and I do mean this sincerely--that, in the short or long terms, the benefits of humanity's steady transformation into cyborgs will ultimately outweigh their costs. It may also be that future historians (if there are any) will look back at Ted Kaczynski and conclude that the rest of us were crazy.

For the moment, I reserve judgement.

no title

abstractions, even abstractors, don't, strictly, exist: abstracting occurs, that's it

Wager

Thirty six million people die each year of privation. More than one per second. Victims are disproportionately African children under six.

I'm not much of a gambler. I can't remember whether a straight beats a flush. Still, I'll bet dollars against dimes that child mortality in Africa, due to malnourishment and other easily preventable causes, could be eradicated within a year for only a fraction of what socially conscientious middle class Americans (easily among the most materially privileged people in world history) will spend, in the same span, on entertaining themselves. No legislation whatsoever required, just a twitch of collective will.

Takers?